AS FAST AS IT GETS….

The rate at which human mind is able to churn out thoughts is amazing…..in fact a bit disgusting too..especially when all you would want is silence……

Family and friends…..are they the same..do they ever mean the same..how should one perceive either of these categories? You think of it…you get thousand explanations, rationale..and logic..but at the end of it all what counts is what you believe in….neednt be the same as what others think….but so long as you have the ocnviction to back up ur feelings…that’s about all one can ask for…..well..how different are friends by the way? Only thought which comes to my mind is..that they are not related to me either chromosomally or sexually…..but other than that? I respect them the same way I would a family member of mine…give them the same importance….what if you have to decide between either of them at a time of crisis? Well, that would be based on the merit of the need. Holy cow….that is cold blooded pig headed objectivity. So be it. But may be not….maybe, I will lean more towards my family (??) cz I know that my friend will understand my predicament. You mean to say your family doesn’t understand ur predicament? Well not like that, its just that the current psyche of the ‘normal’ family is to take t for granted that come what may – family comes first. I don’t blame it one bit at all. Maybe when I grow up..have a family of my own..i will try my best not to be like this…if I have to take anyone for granted…let it be everyone…if my child ha to decide between A or B let it always be based on merit and not on social obligations…..AMEN

Why are you so indifferent? Coz I don’t care? Oh really??? Well not exactly…then why the hell? Hmmm…..does it really matter? What if I say it matters to me…..Oh good….is it a feeling of insecurity? Bull shit…..then whaat? Don’t you ever love anyone well enough to feel for them? To empathise? That I do..you never help out…..why should i? I mean….i believe a plant grows strong and survives when it fights it out amidst the bushes, trees and shrubbery…not when it is planted in a pot and cared for day in and day out…..cut the crap will you? Just because your thoughts are different than mine..dont insult my thinking…..ohh so you do care eh? Where goes your indifference? Dammit….you first crown me as being indifferent when I am not..and you then accuse me of not being indifferent…this is the limit…..oh really? I have nothing to say….when did u ever have anything to say?

To cry, to laugh, to feel, to be….this is what I wanna be….far from the maddening crowd did I go..only to find that the madness shadowed me…then I realized……the reason for the insanity….and then I became sane J

Books that have made a positive impact on me….

Doctors, Class, Acts of Faith & Love Story – Erich Segal – Doctors and Class are my most favorite coz I could not only relate myself to the story but could also see a lot of my friends in that book. The way Segal goes about sketching out the characters is wonderful. Barney, Laura, Bennet, Elliot, Jason (am not sure if I got the name right/the guy in the Class who goes on to join Israel defense)……..they just stay on your memory forever.

Treasure Island, Three Musketeer, Count of Monte Cristo, Huckleberry Finn, Tom Sawyer, Heidi, Adventures of Robin Hood – these books are ideal for a lazy day in a cozy couch drinking hot tea/coffee with an overcast amience…Such ambience makes the story grow on you….especially when you are young and in your schools. Long John Silver, Athos, Little John – these are my favorites.

Then comes Atlas Shrugged, Fountainhead, Anthem, Siddartha – these have their own way of revving you up. Roark, D’Anconia, the irresistible Galt, the carefree Dannerskjold, Rearden, Wynand – you can see the strength in their characters that comes over and above any flaw they might have. These books…you should read, digest and read it again….on and on….

To Kill A Mockingbird, Brothers Karamazov, Painted House, Roots, Guide – these????..well ou know the type of books…you read…it moves on…slowly steadily…and at the end of it..you come out satisfied..sometimes with a lump in your throat....Alyosha, Finch, Kintah Kunte…..they stand out….

Cloud Atlas…for the way it engrosses you….Godfather – wonderful story…perhaps one book which on reading you can actually feel the emotion and the cold bloodedness….

And if you are a uzhavar sandhai hater..Companero, Palestine, Confessions of an economic hit man, fateful triangle, the roaring nineties, globalization and its discontent….excepting the first book, in others the author would have clinically put forth the facts….

Other good non fictions…Oh Jerusalem, Power, autobiography of LeeIacocca…….

Crappiest..........

Vetti payale…vetti payale…seidhi keladaaa….naa ezhudha pogum blogugal elaam….unmai dhaan adaa unmai dhaan adaa…….

Collegukku pona pinnu…raggingu panrenunnu…..moondru ezhuthu ketta vaarthai solla sonaanga….naa sonna pinne…mayakam pottu vizhundhu putaanga…avanga vizhundhu putaanga……

Vetti payale…vetti payale…seidhi keladaaa….

Krishnaroda geethopadesam venumna paduchu putu…manasu kula vechirundhe….nenachu paakanum….adhai vittu putu enkitte discuss paninaa…avasthai padanum…neeyum avasthai padanum…….

Vetti payale…vetti payale…seidhi keladaaa….

Avani avittam vandhaa…kovilukku kootindu poi….poonala maathudaa nu solirundhaanga…aachaaramaa nadanthukanumnu solla senjaanga……

Vetti velai senjaalum…kovilukku pomaaten….naan nallavannu enikkum nee nambi vidaathey…….naan unnai yemaathintten nu ninaithu nee vembi vidaathey..nee vembi vidaathey……

Vetti payale…vetti payale…seidhi keladaaa….

Confessions of a raving lunatic…..

If there is one thing I ask for in my life…it is this…..let me have the strength to always walk THAT extra yard…let me give up only for the heck of it..not because I cant do it…..i know I cant always decide the what is to happen t o me…but I can always decide how to act….AND react….with that in my control…I shall conquer this world….my heart shall blow the conch shell of victory…and my brain shall lead me victorious…my eyes are not directed below..but beyond the horizon…what I see is not what I am faced with…what I see is what I set myself to achieve….

Peter vittadhu podhum da….naaye…..Hmmmpph….that was one heavy load of loose ended….verbose…..mother hoodly bull shit…..lets get over it……

You know what….i love walking a lot…..in fact I walk miles together…and love each and every step I take…..many of my friends have been my unfortunate companions…forced into this type of salt satyagraha….(salt coming out of our sweat u see)…..often…I walk alone….just for the heck of it…..first few kms is ok….then???? then you feel that throbbing in ur shin……appaala? Still you continue…..it is followed by tightening of ur calf…..aparom? then you legs get rubbery….and then..you catch the bus..and return to our abode……ippo edhukku idhu laam solre? Vera vellai ille adhu naala dhaan…..

Arre yaar…..bakchodhi bandh bi kar saale……

Ok fine…let me give share a secret to you…whenever you come across people…who are adept at speaking volumes and volumes..without meaning anything of significance….you can be assured that more often than not..they come from the same breed of post graduate institution as me….yes..there are exceptions to the rule….but still…..ok…what other features characterizes this species??? Quantifying any and every damn thing…losing out on the subjectivity part…more importantly on the natural and aesthetic part of life…being as vague as one can be…..wearing the cloak of ‘thinking through a problem’ and presenting ‘both sides of the coin’ while in reality they are pissing in their pants not knowing what to do….forgetting the true import of the native saying ‘vandhaa malai…pona masuru’ …..and ya….gut feel is generally superseded by analysis (correlation, STP, optimization….)…the result???? Majority of the entrepreneurs and highly successful heads of company are people from simple (or no) educational background…and THIS species is always there giving PPTs…..

OK..have you got THAT shit outta your basement yet????

Lines I love……unmaiyya sonaa shanmugakeerthanam…..I swear by my life and my love of it…I shall not live for the sake of any man nor ask anyone to live for mine….conversations I love….between roark and the dean in fountain head….between siddartha and gottama in siddartha….between kamal and sivaji in devar magan…..

‘oru kadha sollu da…..oru ooru la madhu nu oru kennaiyan irundhaana….haiiiii comedy storyaaa?....aamaam!!!oorey kai thatti sirichudhu…..’

Simple pleasures in life…..

Having your father cajoling you and waking you up…..sipping a hot mug of coffee along with ur parents early in the morning……experiencing the mannvaasanai as soon as the first rain pours……wearing a cloth that is still warm from the baking sun…..cycling uphill and all of a sudden rattling down hill…..eating sookha rotis with hot dhal……watching a baby sleep…..the relief you get just after you cry your heart out….sitting with you back against your dad’s legs (while he is on a easy-chair)….being with somebody with whom you don’t need to speak..and yet you feel fulfilled….the whiff of salted air just as you are nearing the beach….laughing heartily without inhibition and infectiously…a call from your loved ones….when you most expect it….givin tight hug – a jaadhoo ki jhappi….to ur friends….watching sportsmen ‘who just cannot give up’ play….getting a hand written letter…..the smell of burnt crackers early in the morning of diwali….eating ripe an full mango…..moar saadham with pachchai vengaayam…..getting fully drenched in rain….singing hoarsely much to other’s inconvenience J , being able to sleep as soon as you lie down….sleeping for just that 5 min between two snoozes in ur alarm clock....

Its time for thanksgiving.......

So what do u do when u reach home early from office, got nothing to do….you are not in a position to be spending the evening and night speaking sweet nothings to ur loved one…..and are bored to death???????????????? U WRITE A BLOG………all in the hope that there is some one……somewhere….who is in a more pitiable state than you and HAS to read whatever crap you put forth……….

‘pullaiyaar suzhi potaachaaa? Seri…ippo matterku varalaam’

You come across different type of people in this world….and more often than not..looking back…you are happy to have been with them…to have learnt something from them…..

Today I am gonna subject the readers to a wonderful friend…..who has always been a source of strength for me….who has been with me through my toughest time….and who has made me never settle for nething but the best……

I always had this habit of juxtaposing my friends with some characters straight out of a movie or a novel…..and whenever I think of her….the person who first comes to my mind is Laura Castellano….why so???? Dunno exactly…..maybe because of the comfort level I have with her….maybe because of the platonic relation I share with her…or maybe because I had ran out of any more decent characters…..

You know….the closest to you are the ones to whom you don’t need to explain yourself….you don’t need to express yourself…..all you need to do…is …..just to be…….and she was one of the very few people with whom I could just…..be…

What’s so special about her? Have never analyzed that…never will…..analyzing feelings and thoughts constrains the human understanding within the four walls of human wisdom. I dont need that….i don’t want that….

I believe relations are to be experienced…..these are like painting on a limitless canvas….you go about adding a line here…a streak there….always giving yourself and your friends the opportunity to explore….to learn..to understand…and at the end of it all….you can sense the pattern developing in the big canvas…..

‘seri…ippo ennaaangarey? Romba penaathindrukey?’

Hmm…so back to Laura….one of the very few people whom I have respected right from the moment I have seen her…..she had loads of ability…..was ambitious….was unafraid to try new things..and was always up for a challenge…..and I must say…that the day I first met her…..i got mightily raped….ahem….by her brilliance…and by the scathing tongue of my English teacher…..this Laura…was also fundoo…infact the fundooest in my class…. in aangila mozhi…..

Probably the bestest thing I liked in her..and learnt from her..was – dreams have to be backed by action….with her….i started dreaming…with her..i started believing in my dreams…and..i started achieving them too…and all the while she was there goading me….competing with me….stretching me to my limits….and never being satisfied with whatever I did….coz she always felt I could do more….

In a way…we were complementary…..me a lazy bum…and she a perennially active person….me..with a galeej tongue..and she…a very sophisticated one….me always gruff and moody….she always chirpy….me..thinking I will do something….and she…doing THAT very thing….me..a Barney….and she….a Laura…

No need for expressing....no need for explaining...all you need to do is just....BE

‘tentu kottaai la elaaru padam paathaachaaa? Ippo apadiye apeet aaikonga paarkalaam……’

Ek Choti Si Love Story

Run of the mill ones…..’I was in my school..there was this cute teacher…who used to be so sweet…..and beautiful…..and nice…..and I think she always had a soft corner for me’….well that is crap#1 ‘there was this neighbor of mine..who used to steal glances at me…. Knew she had something in mind..and was waiting or me to make the move’……crap#2

If we were to list in detail all the crushes that one has had…it would make a cart load full of bull shit. But then..that is what crush is all about…..you close ur eyes….and think…that…all is rosy around you…..you have the girl of ur dreams (women in some cases)….U r in her dream….and you live happily…AND then straight out of the blue…comes a knock….from whatever is left of the functional brain in you…..which says…’mawune dei..kanavu kandadhu podhum….asadu vazhiyaradha konjam nirithuttu…..ozhunga vellaiya paakara vazhiya paaru’

Crush is to an extent fine…it is easy to come out of it… …at the end of it all…when we think back about it….one is always in a position to share a laugh or two amidst embarrassment.

And so with this introduction lemme…prepare my own load of bull shit…..

It started way back when I was in school…..i must thank my sister a lot..coz one of my earliest crushes was her classmate……and that set the tone for most of my future crushes…..which always had me gawking at them…..and getting myself in such a twisted condition….that anyone could see the ‘jollu kottra moonji’ a thousand miles away…..then there was one in my tennis class…and then one….in my drama group….and then one…well…quite a few..in my college…..near my house……near the local temple……

This later matured into….a more sedate type of crush…..no more gawking..no more asadu vazhinjings….a very quite demeanor…trying to be as nice as possible..so that atleast you wont be avoided by your ‘crush’…….but then the inevitable always happened…’indha mara mandai ku innum puriya maatengaradhey…..’

Fir kya hua?????? Fir…………fir raveenaa aaayiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii………….

Heard this somewhere? Well munna bhai it is….

And my story is the same too……one gone…one came…..this bloody mind…if ever it was good at something, it was on focusing and refocusing on things which didn’t require any attention at all…….

‘Dei…ava ennaiye paakara da’…….’right…una maadhiri kennai laam kooda indha ulagathula irukaala nu paakara’…..‘dei….whenever I go to cycling…she is always there….’ – ‘machaan….it the other way round da….nee naal muzhukka…..road la dhaan irukka…..ava illenaa vera yaaraavhadhu irundhirupa…..appo kooda nee idhey dialogue dhaan adichiruppe….’

And THEN the nirvana comes….NO..i am not talking of any of ur crush working out……I am talking about U realizing that ur ‘crushy’ feelings are superficial the moment you feel them….and then….the girls are saved……from ur gaucheness